Your Soul's Truth

Alix & the Archangels

Who Are You Responsible For?

handset from vintage phone

Twenty Open Lines

Can you imagine sitting at your desk at work, with twenty phones piled on your desk, each one connected to a live conversation at the other end of the phone line? In this nightmare scenario, you aren’t actually trying to talk to any of those twenty people, but they are trying to talk to you. Even though you are trying to ignore them, little snippets of sound keep getting through—yelling, tears, laughter. And because you can hear those little snippets, you are occasionally drawn to pick up one of those phones and say something, before you put it down again.

How would you feel about working under those conditions? Would you be distracted, confused, and find it hard to concentrate and get any work done?

Well, guess what? Most of us live our lives with the equivalent of twenty–or more!–open phone lines all the time. Except that instead of being physical phones, they’re energetic ones.

When you hear an energy worker talk about energetic cords—invisible yet potent connections between two people—this is exactly what they are talking about.

The Birth of Responsibility

Here’s what the angels have to say today about cords.

Dear Ones, this is Archangel Gabriel. I’m so delighted to be here with you this morning to talk about this important topic. Let us begin as we always do, with a story.

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, humans were as savvy about energy—the unseen conditions of their lives—as they were about hunting and gathering food. They knew that energy was real, and that understanding and working with energy was as important as eating and bathing. They lived seamlessly between two worlds—the world of the physical and the world of the non-physical.

But after a while things changed and humans left the space of deep knowingness and interconnectedness to move into a disconnected space of unhealed ego and overactive minds. This did not happen all at once, but gradually. Some humans stepped into ego-mind energy more quickly than others, and some humans stayed awake and connected.

Just as a mother might feed her children until they are old enough to cook, so the awake humans felt a sense of having to take care of the ones who decided to separate from the world consciousness.

It’s as if the conscious ones  were the only bilingual people in a room full of speakers of two different languages. These conscious ones felt compelled to serve, and they served often at the cost of their lives, of many of their lives. It was their duty and their calling.

But they too were not immune to the energy and the attraction of ego, and they began to feel that because they were awake they were special. They carried the power and the magic of spirit and confused it with human power and status. And for all these reasons they wrapped their power in the chains of service, for with great power comes great responsibility, correct?

Responsibility Interferes with Growth

Not so much. Not anymore. For in this time of the awakening of an entire planet, the thing that matters the most is that all humans reconnect to their own spirits. And one way for them to do that is through the crucible of pain. For pain asks us, indeed motivates us, to grow. And therefore to be responsible for someone else is to to siphon off some of the pain that their spirits have created to help them grow.

If we look at another person’s pain and feel responsible for it, we are getting in the middle of that person’s soul growth process.

So responsibility energy is very sticky indeed. It comes from good intentions, but it often doesn’t work very well. And when we don’t monitor ourselves, we end up with energetic cords attaching us to people in our lives—family, clients, colleagues or friends—and then we’re living in that crazy space with all those open phone lines all the time.

So what? So what is so terrible about accepting those cords of connection?

Well, to clarify, cords of love are always fine. You can give and receive love endlessly for the highest good of all concerned. But let’s unpack the cords of responsibility.

We Are Responsible for Our Inferiors

When we feel responsible for someone else, we are energetically creating a relationship of non-equals—a one-up, one-down status. We are responsible for taking care of small children and animals because they are dependent upon us to fill their basic needs. They are in a one-down status compared to us, their caregivers.

When an adult feels responsible for another adult, however, that one-down status is a relationship killer. When a woman feels responsible for her mate, she is acting like a mother, not a lover.

When a friend feels responsible for a friend, they are giving that friend the clear message: I don’t trust you to take care of yourself. I don’t trust you to make the right decisions for your life. Ouch!

And when a lightworker feels responsible for a client, she is claiming and holding some of that client’s personal power. Yup, she’s creating a teacher/student power imbalance. As new earth teachers, we really don’t need or want our students’ power—in fact, we are usually working hard to get our students to see and to claim their power!

A lightworker who feels responsible for many clients leave all those phone lines open, so to speak, which is draining and exhausting and serves no one.

Cords Drain Energy

What happens when a cord of connection exists between two people? Let’s use the student-teacher example to look at this. As lightworkers, we have all looked for and found teachers—those who are a bit ahead of us on the journey and so able to reach back a hand and help us along.

Finding the right teacher can be an exciting and uplifting time. We feel the euphoria of spreading our wings, and we often admire the person who is leading us. Unconsciously, we send out energy cords to link with that teacher’s energy, in an attempt to learn what they know, be who they are.

And, still unconsciously, we pull the teacher’s energy towards us and into us.

So the student is sending admiration, but sometimes also anger, frustration, resentment, envy, and even rage down the cord to her teacher. And the student is attempting to siphon off some of the teacher’s power and wisdom. Unconsciously, for the most part.

If the teacher is feeling responsible for her student’s growth or progress, that creates an opening in the teacher’s psychic protection (assuming she has any protection, which many practitioners do not). And the teacher may absorb some or all of the negative energy, which will leave her feeling drained and even sick.

Warning Signs of Energy Cords

Unless you actively look for and clear cords on a regular basis, you probably have them. However, there are some warning signs to watch out for. You may have energetic cords connecting you to your friends, family, or clients if

  • You keep thinking about certain people even when you’re not talking to them
  • You worry about people
  • You feel drained after working with clients
  • You feel physical symptoms that don’t make sense to you—unexpected fatigue, headaches, stomachaches, nausea
  • You spend a lot of your time, money, and attention trying to help other people fix their lives

The Hidden Reason You Allow These Cords

There’s actually a big payoff, a big reason you might find yourself with so many people you feel responsible for and so many corresponding energetic cords.

Your position as the fixer can really stroke your ego, as you see yourself as better than the people you are helping. Your students’ admiration and gratitude can fill you up as you allow them to validate you. Both of these are ego body reactions.

But the biggest payoff comes from the level of distraction it provides.

As long as you are responsible for other people, you can avoid turning the spotlight on your own growth. You can avoid doing your own soul work, while at the same time getting strokes for helping others.

Except that, of course, you aren’t really helping them. You are standing between your “fixees” and the mess they have made of their lives, and in doing so, you are forgetting that the purpose of their pain is to motivate them to grow.

Cutting the Cords

It takes a lot of training to work with clients and keep your energy separate from theirs. And in fact, your energy and that of your clients will get inevitably get mixed up to some degree, so you need to know how to fix that when it happens. The angels and I see so many, many lightworkers who are unaware of the need to create and maintain energetic boundaries and energy hygiene in their work with clients.

But for today, if we have convinced you that you’re ready to hang up some of those open phone lines, here are a few things you can do.

  • Commit to minding your own business—which quite literally means focusing on yourself and your own soul growth. Ask yourself what work you have been avoiding doing.
  • Imagine hanging up the phone on any and all people you have been preoccupied with. Each time you find yourself distracted by someone else’s problems, send them love and hang up the energetic phone on them. You may need to hang up the physical phone, too!
  • Ask Archangel Michael to cut your cords to the people you feel responsible for.
  • Change the conversation in your head from “How can I help this person?” to “How can I help this person help themselves?” A tiny switch, but a big difference!
  • Stop trying to heal your family and friends! A therapist wouldn’t counsel her family members or friends, and you shouldn’t try to fix yours.
  • Begin to experiment with the difference between responsibility and support, between pity and compassion. Can you love and support your family, friends, and clients, without taking their power away from them?
  • Start noticing how it makes you feel when other people take responsibility for you. Not so fun when the shoe is on the other foot, is it?

And as always, if you need support, the Archangels and I are here. We can help you release responsibility, cut cords, and reclaim your power. We can even help you with that soul growth you’ve been avoiding! Angel wink.

We love you so much.


Alix and the Archangels

PS Ready to learn how to establish and maintain strong psychic boundaries? This online workshop is just for you!

About Alix

Hi! I’m Alix. I'm an intuitive life coach, energy healer,  and channel for the wisdom and healing of the archangels. I help my clients get the answers they need.

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